


The touch of your skin (is softer than I could have dreamed)

by keelah_seyah



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Body Hair, Confessions, Fantasizing, Kissing, M/M, Soft Boys, beefy fjord, shirtless fjord, the only main characters are Fjord and Caleb, the rest are just mentions - Freeform, this is self indulgent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-09
Updated: 2019-06-09
Packaged: 2020-04-23 10:58:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,856
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19149649
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/keelah_seyah/pseuds/keelah_seyah
Summary: I just really wanted to write Fjord being beefy and soft, and why not throw in some good ol' log cabin fantasizing and kisses under the stars while I'm at it?





	The touch of your skin (is softer than I could have dreamed)

**Author's Note:**

> It's midnight and I haven't so much as read over this, so please excuse any typos and grammatical mistakes. 
> 
> Boys are hot and I have no self control.

Caleb had a habit of avoiding looking at anyone at all when the Nein visited a bath house. It was easier than accidentally drifting into middle distance while staring at someone’s junk. And it was exactly that lack of exposure to… bodies… in recent years that was why Caleb couldn’t stop thinking about Fjord’s now. At least,  that’s what he told himself. He hadn’t meant to look this time either, but he’d been watching the sun set over the ocean when Fjord stepped out of the surf and into his field of view. His body was dripping with water, and like always, Fjord walked with a sort of casual purpose. He wasn’t in a hurry, but he knew where he was going. The water slicked down his body hair at odd angles, pressing it against the bluegreen mottles of his skin. But what made Caleb swallow hard at the sight was the sheer bulk of the half-orc’s form. He always looked big, but Caleb had always attributed that to his armour. Now he could see the broadness of Fjord’s shoulders, the way his pectoral muscles hung heavy against his chest, and the paunch of his stomach. Caleb wanted to bury his face in it all, and felt himself flush red as that thought came to the front of his mind. Fjord wasn’t just tough, he looked  _ soft _ . Sure, there was muscle underneath, but he carried weight like he was settling into a comfortable life. On the one hand, thank the gods he had been wearing breeches, because Caleb didn’t know what he would have done if he’d had to witness anything more intimate than he already had, but on the other, the slight spill of Fjord’s hips over the tight leather had been practically indecent, to say nothing of the telltale thickening of hair where the breeches laced up. Before Caleb’s eyes had time to sink into the way Fjord’s thighs strained against leather, his attention had been pulled away by Jester screeching something about Nott eating a seagull, and he gratefully ripped his gaze away, hoping the sight of the blood and feathers would relieve him of the strain against his own breeches. 

 

The beach trip that Caleb was now referring to in his head as “The Incident” had happened days ago now, and he still couldn’t get the sight out of his head. More than once he’d woken up after a too detailed dream about kissing down that soft torso and had to hastily extricate himself from the room he shared with Nott, lest she ask too many questions. It had been too long since he’d shown this kind of interest in anything for it not to raise questions from her, and he didn’t want to think about the consequences if he accidentally said or did something in his sleep. 

 

It was a clear night and they made the call not to sleep in Leomund’s tiny hut. The close quarters could be uncomfortable, and in the summer heat they’d decided that they could do with the fresh air. Caleb was grateful, except for one thing. Fjord had decided that the sticky summer air was warm enough that he didn’t need a shirt at all. He’d stripped it off after setting up the campfire, and was wandering around the field they’d stopped in gathering up kindling to pile next to the fire. Caleb could just see him cutting wood for a hearth, glistening with sweat as he swung an axe high above his head- 

“-aleb! Caleb!” He blinked his way back into the real world as Nott poked him in the side. 

“ _ Was _ ?” 

“Do you want three sausages, or four?” 

“Uhh, three.” 

“You’re getting four.” She pushed a plate into his hands, loaded with sausages, bread, and boiled vegetables. He wasn’t sure when the others had cooked. How long had he been daydreaming? 

“What were you thinking about there Caleb?” Fjord’s voice cut in, and Caleb just about dropped his plate. 

“Just- things. You know. Wizard… stuff.” Dusty books and copying out spells. Definitely not a cottage in the woods and a half orc chopping lumber for the hearth. Definitely not muscles rippling and sweat gleaming and the rhythmic sound of an axe. 

“Uhuh.” Fjord didn’t sound convinced, and Caleb tried to tell himself it was the heat coming off the campfire that was colouring his cheeks. 

“You’ve been zoning out a lot in the last few days actually Caleb, are you sick?” That was Jester.  _ Fuck _ . 

“ _ Nein _ , no. I am not sick.” 

“You’ve been waking up early too, is there something we should know?” Now Nott had questions, and Caleb wanted to sink into the earth. 

“No, no, I am just having trouble sleeping. And I am zoning out because I am tired. It is silly. I’m sure it’ll be fine.” 

“Maybe you just need something to relax you before bed,” Mollymauk added to the conversation, picking at his teeth, “you know, when we get back to Zadash I know this great girl at the Pillow Trove who will have you feeling right as rain in no time”

“No!” Caleb sputtered, much more forceful than necessary. “No, that’s… No.” 

“I know a guy too, if that’s an -”

“Please, Mollymauk. Shut up.” 

“Sorry for bringing it up Caleb. I didn’t meant to subject you to the inquisition.” Fjord’s voice was a calming rumble, and it wasn’t helping at  _ all _ . It was only lucky that Caduceus hadn’t chimed in as well. Caleb was sure that the Firbolg cleric could somehow sense the cause of his distress. 

“It is not a problem. It is just a personal issue, not a group one, and so I am not so comfortable in sharing it.” 

“It’s all good Caleb. Hey, why don’t you take a walk while we pack up dinner. You look like you could stand to be away from the campfire a bit. You’re all red.” Of course. Beau knew him well enough to try and hide her concern in a joke about his colouring- unfortunately this time she didn’t know what she was hiding. 

“BEAU.” Fjord chastised, and Jester burst out laughing.

“No, no, it is a good idea. I’ll.. I’ll be back.” Caleb stood, leaving his dinner mostly untouched, and walked into the darkness of the field, quietly casting a globule of light to hover on his shoulder so that he could see. He needed to get over this obsession. He wouldn’t even do it the dignity of referring to it as a crush. At this point, it was just a fantasy. It was based on nothing more than physical attraction, and there was absolutely no need for it to be treated as anything more than that. 

 

Once he got a decent distance from the camp, he sat down in the grass and summoned Frumpkin. 

“Hallo Frumpkin. You’re the only hairy belly I need to rub my face on, aren’t you?” He mumbled into Frumpkin’s fur. He was staring at the stars and absentmindedly patting Frumpkin when there was a sneeze from behind him. Caleb jumped, and a large hand stopped him from getting to his feet. Before he knew it, Fjord was sitting cross legged in the grass next to him. He’d put his shirt back on at some point, and Caleb silently sent up a prayer of thanks to whoever was listening. 

“Sorry to intrude Caleb,” Fjord was quiet, hesitant. “I’m just - have I done something to upset you? You’ve hardly looked at me in days.” 

Caleb just about laughed aloud. 

“Nein Fjord, you have not done anything wrong at all. I am being childish.” 

“Childish?” 

“Ja, I am a grown man who cannot keep his feelings in check. It will pass.”

“What kind of feelings? There’s no shame in feeling, you know. It doesn’t make you less of anything to express yourself.” Fjord’s voice was even softer than before, a rumble more felt than heard, and Caleb couldn’t help but look up into his eyes. He couldn’t see their true colour in the light of his spell, just the shine of bluish light reflecting. 

“I-” He felt himself choke up, “it isn’t fair to share this struggle.” 

“I can handle it Caleb. I’d like to help, if I can.” 

A flush coated Caleb’s face, and he forced himself to look away from Fjord’s face. Fjord cleared his throat awkwardly. 

“This is… can I make a guess at what the issue might be?” 

Caleb looked back at Fjord, confused, and Fjord continued, his voice halting. 

“I’ve developed… an admiration for you, while we’ve been travelling together, and I got a bit bold the other day at the beach, got a bit up in your space. It was juvenile really, I guess I was trying to show off? Anyway, if I came on too strong, coming to disturb you out in the water like that when you wanted your space, and you’re uncomfortable with my attention, just let me know and I’ll back off.”

“What?” Caleb couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “What are you talking about?”

“Oh!” It was Fjord’s turn to blush and look away. “You didn’t- this wasn’t about that at all, was it?” 

“ _ Nein _ , no! I - “ Caleb stopped, a sudden rush of bravery coming over him. “I am definitely not uncomfortable with your attention Fjord.” He slowed his words down, trying to keep his voice even. 

“You’re not? 

“No!” A thousand images that had been at the forefront of his mind over the last few days suddenly surged forwards. 

“Oh. Uh.” Caleb heard Fjord take a deep breath, hesitating. “Uh in that case, Caleb. Can I kiss you?” 

Caleb’s heart stopped, and he felt like he was a million miles away, hearing himself agree. 

Then Fjord’s mouth was on his. He was gentle, gentler than Caleb had anticipated, and one hand cupped Caleb’s face like he was scared to break him. Caleb pressed into the kiss, deepening it briefly before pulling away. When he looked back up at Fjord, he couldn’t help but let a smile spread across his lips. 

“Suddenly, I feel very stupid.” Caleb muttered.

“What do you mean?” 

“At the beach- When you left the water it was the first time I had really seen you shirtless. I don’t look, usually. I’ve been… distracted. Since.”

“By me?”

“Gods Fjord. Yes. You’re beautiful.” Caleb stopped himself from continuing, raving on about all the things he’d thought about Fjord’s body since that day.

“Naw I’m-”

“You’re beautiful. I was trying to stop myself from thinking it, from letting my feelings grow from that fact. I’m-” Caleb grinned, sheepish “- I’m glad I don’t have to stop, now.” 

Fjord leaned in and kissed Caleb again. He was less gentle this time, like he was letting himself experience the kiss. Before, Caleb realised, he was being courteous, letting Caleb set the pace. This kiss was what Fjord wanted. Caleb returned it in full, leaning in until he was practically in Fjord’s lap, reaching up and tracing the line of his jaw with the hand he had free. The other steadied him on the dirt of the field. In the distance, an owl cried. 

 


End file.
